elcome again to The Nice British Bake-Off, and after a couple of detours, this week we’re lastly again to a baking-centric theme with the dreaded Pastry Week.
It additionally occurs to be the quarter-finals, so naturally worry ranges are excessive – however fortunately, all of the bakers nonetheless have time for “good lucks” and hugs earlier than beginning.
“I can’t consider I’m right here. I’m now surrounded by all Star Bakers!” Abdul gushes. Very candy, however should you’re the one one who’s not gotten it but, Abdul, alarm bells ought to be ringing barely.
As Matt and Noel introduce the theme, it transpires that this week’s Signature bake will likely be twelve candy vol-au-vents. Comprising rough-puff pastry and a candy filling, they appear somewhat a distinct segment selection – a lot in order that Abdul has by no means heard of them earlier than. Uh-oh.
Maxy thinks they’re grocery store get together meals (elevating questions on which grocery store she outlets at, precisely) whereas Janusz witheringly manufacturers them as “so seventies”. Look, the judges are getting on, alright?
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Previous (or not) as they’re, they’re additionally on the warpath. “It’s the quarter-final and we’re anticipating nothing however perfection,” Paul says, whereas Prue ominously provides that they’re planning on being “actually ruthless”.
No stress then. Because the bake will get underway, Syabira is already cracking on with a mandarin cream-cheese filling for her vol-au-vents, whereas Janusz and Abdul are going for traditional flavours: one with strawberries and cream, the opposite with a berry compote and coconut.
“I don’t need to spook you, however you’re the one baker who hasn’t had Star Baker,” Prue tells poor Abdul, inflicting Noel to step in and defend him.
Underneath stress: Abdul
/ Love Productions/ Channel 4On this most worrying of weeks, lamination (folding collectively butter and dough to create a super-moist pastry) is the phrase on each baker’s lips, which makes it all of the extra worrying when Maxy says she’s working with heat somewhat than chilly butter to make her gooseberry-and-cloudberry-jam vol-au-vents, prompting a cautious non-reaction from the judges.
As time ticks on, catastrophe strikes: with half an hour to go, Sandro realises that he didn’t flip the oven on.
“It may nonetheless work out,” he says with a panicked expression, then concedes, “these may very well be the worst vol-au-vents ever made.”
And it’s not simply Sandro who has issues: as he races to prepare dinner his pastries, the butter has began leaking out of Abdul’s, whereas Maxy’s don’t appear to be cooking in any respect. “I don’t need to current uncooked pastry!” she cries.
Regardless of the time stress, Sandro miraculously manages to bake his vol-au-vents – although that’s maybe the one constructive factor that may be mentioned for them. They’re flat, leaking butter and look, in his phrases, “like Yorkshire puddings”.
And in a double tragedy, it seems he’s worn his particular leather-based trousers particularly for at the moment – as Noel says, perhaps he can use them to distract Prue.
When time is known as, it’s a story of two halves. Syabira and Janusz’s choices look pristine, whereas Maxy, Abdul and Sandro’s vol-au-vents are blasted for his or her lack of peak and color, messiness and lacking (gasp) lamination.
“It’s nearly only a sheet of puff pastry with bits on the highest,” Paul says damningly of Abdul’s choices, earlier than nearly cracking his tooth on one in every of Sandro’s, whose sartorial efforts sadly aren’t sufficient to avoid wasting him from a tongue-lashing.
On the opposite aspect of the tent, Janusz makes an attempt to cowl up his substituted whipped cream filling with a breezy: “What crème pat?” Sadly, the underside of his pastries are pronounced uncooked, and ultimately it’s solely Syabira who comes out of it effectively, with Paul calling her pastries nearly good.
Because the bakers lick their wounds – Sandro mourns his missed alternative to get a handshake, earlier than declaring, “I don’t even need it now” – issues transfer on apace to the technical problem.
“Bakers, there are 29 components on this recipe, so please get the steadiness proper,” Prue tells the ashen-faced bakers. Because it seems, they’ll be making spring rolls, and naturally, not one of the bakers have by no means made them earlier than.
As issues get underway, there’s a minefield of errors mendacity in wait – the bakers don’t know how a lot water to incorporate of their dough. As Prue tells us, an excessive amount of of it may end in large, ugly bubbles when the roll is deep-fried.
And that’s earlier than they get onto cooking the mushrooms, which look extremely toxic and which, based on Syabira, have a very robust style and ought to be used with warning. Naturally, Abdul first forgets so as to add them, then provides all of them.
Assist: Maxy within the Technical Problem
/ Love Productions/ Channel 4Quickly, everyone is sweating profusely, as they’ve solely been given an hour and twenty minutes to get all of it completed.
“This is sort of a full pace spring-roll making competitors,” a flushed Syabira says as she preps her pastry. And when the time involves make the dipping sauce, no person has any recipe for that both, leading to Sandro dumping a hodgepodge of components collectively and discovering out it tastes “disgusting”.
A number of burnt fingers later, time is up, and whereas Maxy laments her tiny spring rolls the judges get to work.
Syabira has certainly included an excessive amount of water in her dough, Maxy’s rolls are largely pastry and Abdul has (shock, shock) put an excessive amount of mushroom within the filling. Even worse, Janusz appears to have miscounted his, and solely made seven (he’s as bemused because the judges as to the place the eighth has gone), however what’s left is scrumptious.
That leaves Sandro to select up the crown for finest roll, whereas Maxy nets final place. With the bakers neck and neck, we come to the Showstopper, which is suitably ludicrous: they have to make a 3D pie scene impressed by their favorite childhood story – which should even be “immediately recognisable” as well.
They’re below stress, as Paul is unimpressed by the shoddy requirements of the bakes to this point. “I need to see baking nirvana,” he tells the digital camera.
Because the bakers get cracking, it’s clear that curry is the order of the day. Abdul is making a Treasure Island-themed pie scene filled with aubergine curries and apple crumbles, Maxy is making spicy rooster, and Syabira is making a Jack and the Beanstalk-themed rooster rendang pie – although she’s substituting a coconut tree for the notorious beanstalk.
Throughout the tent, Sandro and Janusz are each making Very Hungry Caterpillar-themed pies – although Janusz has made his Caterpillar into his personal grasping canine Nigel.
With the baking underway, it quickly turns into clear that Maxy is freewheeling. Not solely is she hand-making filo pastry for her pie – a notoriously difficult factor to do – she additionally appears to have forgotten half the components for her spicy rooster.
“I didn’t write this out correctly… I’ve forgotten fairly a couple of vital issues,” she says, poring over her recipe. As she stresses, Sandro nonetheless finds the time to prank Noel by feeding him a cherry lined in paprika.
Because the acquainted frantic Bake-Off music kicks in, we watch the bakers soften down in actual time as they try and juggle all the various items of their showstoppers, however miraculously, when the buzzer goes they’ve all been accomplished, kind of with out incident. Hurrah: let the judging start!
Scary: Matt, Noel, Paul and Prue
/ Love Productions/ Channel 4As anticipated, there are some beautiful bakes right here however the judges are choosy – our bakers have gotten to the semi-final, requirements have gotten to be excessive. Each Sandro and Janusz’s Hungry Caterpillar choices are condemned as largely dry, whereas Maxy’s mannequin of the world is underdone.
Evidently, Syabira shines as soon as extra together with her Jack and the Palm Tree and comes away with the judges’ approval glowing round her head like an aura.
Regardless of that, within the debrief tent afterwards the temper is grim. Noel describes himself as “traumatised”, whereas Prue presents a damning “actually disappointing”: nearly not one of the bakers have lived as much as their exacting requirements. Has the soggy backside fallen out of the competitors?
With all that mentioned, it’s no shock that Syabira scoops the Star Baker prize but once more for her work (denying Abdul the title as soon as extra) and this time round, it’s Maxy who will get booted out, leaving Sandro trying each devastated and relieved. He’s made it into the semi-finals, and should you thought Pastry Week was unhealthy, simply wait till Patisserie Week…
The Nice British Bake-Off airs on Channel 4 at 8pm on Tuesdays